Are there keys to a healthy marriage? We believe so. These 8 keys will help you lay a strong foundation for your relationship and keep you close and connected.
If you’re married, or considering marriage, you likely want to know how to have a healthy and successful relationship. While there’s no single “recipe” for a happy marriage, there are some key ingredients that are important for any healthy union. Below are eight keys to a healthy marriage.
This is a guest post by Malik Wasif. You can find more of his articles at HubPages.com and EzineArticles.com. His bio is below
A few years ago, my family and I decided to adopt a minimalist way of life. We realized that much clutter was accumulating within our home, which took up excessive energy, money, and time. We began a journey to donate, sell recycling, donate, or take away all of our non-essential items from our homes. It was among the best decisions we’ve made.
When we started removing the “stuff” from our lives and found a new world opened up, we found that we could devote more time to those things we valued the most.
As a result, we spend more time at the dining table and take long walks with our family, and we’ve saved money to go on worthwhile adventures, like spending a weekend on the ocean, for instance.
Eliminating unnecessary items has enabled us to focus more on necessities. And we’ve discovered that real life can be found in the simplest places. Sometimes, our relationships are on the same track.
When we first start and merely depend on one another, we concentrate all our attention on the crucial elements of a happy and prosperous union. But as our relationship grows, “stuff” begins to grow and distract us from the essential aspects of what constitutes a successful marriage.
Suddenly, we are more concerned about the value of our house than we are about our marriage. We monitor the condition of our retirement accounts more frequently than how healthy our relationship is. We also spend more time looking after the garage for our car than the other spouse in our sleeping.
Things start to build up in our homes and lives and demand our money, energy, time, and time. This means there is little left to take care of the essential aspects of a happy marriage.
A beautiful home, car, or retirement account could seem nice; however, these things are not enough to create a happy marriage. They recognize that there are many more fundamental rules to be followed. They’ve learned to put their money, energy, and time into the eight fundamentals of a healthy marriage.
8 Keys To A Healthy Marriage
These eight principles are valuable keys that will help you create the kind of marriage that lasts, plus gives meaning to your relationship.
1. Love and Commitment.
Ultimately, it is a choice to be a part of someone’s life. It might begin like a storybook romance similar to ones shown on television, movies, or romance books, but feelings can fade and disappear. Real commitment, however, will last forever.
Healthy marriages are based on the decision to remain committed to each other through good and bad times. This commitment can be demonstrated by remaining loyal even when things are tough.
Here are three practical things you can to increase communication and deepen love in your marriage.
- Make a point to check in with your partner every day. This can be a quick text or phone call to touch base and see how they’re doing.
- Schedule regular date nights, even if it’s just once a week. This is time for you to focus on each other without distractions.
- Make an effort to do things together as a couple, whether it’s taking a class, going on a hike, or tackling a home improvement project.
2. Loving Fidelity.
I love the concept of ‘loving fidelity’ because it puts faithfulness in a positive light. Too often couples express regret or frustration in their sexual lives. Loving fidelity has no regrets about marriage. It is happy to be committed.
Marriage is more than just having a physical relationship with someone. It includes being emotionally and mentally connected to them too. If you spend time thinking about being intimate with someone else, it takes away from the sexual intimacy you have with your spouse.
When you are intimate with your spouse, you are showing them that you are committed to them and only them.
Your sexuality is something special that you should share with your partner. It’s important to be aware of the consequences of your actions and to be disciplined in order not to let anything get in the way of your relationship.
Many couples get tangled in the web of pornography and other behaviors that erode intimacy and connection.
Sexual faithfulness is more than just ‘not having an affair.’ It is about keeping yourself pure and clean from anything that would interfere with your bond as a couple.
3. Admit Your Imperfections (and Don’t Hold Your Spouses Against Them)
Everyone has weaknesses, and being in a relationship can make these flaws more obvious than when you’re not in a relationship. It’s important to be able to admit that you’re not perfect, that you will make mistakes, and that you’ll need forgiveness from your partner.
f you want your relationship to improve, it’s important to not act like you’re better than your partner. This will only make them resent you and stop the relationship from progressing. If you’re struggling with this, try writing down three things your partner does better than you. This will help you stay humble.
This is something you should practice throughout your marriage.
Acting superior to your spouse will cause resentment and stop your relationship from progressing. If you want to be a good partner, you should try to act like an equal. If you are struggling when it comes to this, get an eraser and quickly list three things your partner can do better than you. That simple task will keep you humble.
4. Practice The Art Of Forgiveness.
Since no one is perfect, the need for patience and forgiveness is essential in a marriage. Couples who are successful in their marriage can demonstrate unending patience and forgiveness towards their spouse. They are humble enough to admit their imperfections and do not demand perfection from their spouse.
This allows them to have a more stable and long lasting marriage.
When you make a mistake, your partner shouldn’t try to hold it against you. And if you hurt each other, you should both try to forgive and move on instead of dwelling on what happened.
5. Give Your Relationship Time And Attention.
If you want your relationship to be strong, you need to put time and effort into it. This means spending time together and being intentional about that time. It’s very rare for a relationship to be strong without both of these things. Your relationship with your spouse should be one of your closest and most intimate connections.
This is why it will take more time than other types of relationships. If you can, make the time in your day to spend with your partner. A date night once every once in a while isn’t bad, either.
Here are three simple things you can do to increase the amount of time you spend together:
1. Take turns planning weekend activities that the whole family can enjoy. This will help ensure that everyone has a say in how the family spends its time together.
2. Designate one night a week as family night, and make a point of doing something fun and engaging together. This can be anything from watching a movie to playing a board game.
3. Make sure to schedule regular check-ins with each other to catch up and chat. This can be done over the phone, via text, or in person.
6. Use The ABC Approach.
In sales, ABC stands for ‘Always Be Closing.’ This is a reference for always thinking about making the sale. In marriage, I refer to the ABC approach as ‘Always Build Connection.’ Connection is that the heart of trust, loyalty, and commitment.
Honesty and trust are important in a marriage. Trust is something that you have to work on and it takes time.
It takes time to earn trust. You have to show that you are the person you say you are and do what you say you will do. It might take months or even years. So start today. If you want to improve your relationships, you will have to work harder at it.
In order to have a happy and successful marriage, both partners need to be honest with each other about their thoughts, feelings, and needs.If something is bothering you, it’s important to talk to your partner about it instead of bottling it up.
Honest communication will help you both understand each other better and strengthen your bond.
Honesty and trust are two of the most important foundations of a strong and lasting marriage. Without these two ingredients, marriages are more likely to crumble under the weight of secrets and lies.
Building a marriage on a foundation of honesty and trust takes work, but it is worth it. Couples who are honest with each other and can be trusted to keep each other’s confidences are more likely to weather the ups and downs of married life.
Trustworthy marriages are also built on mutual respect and understanding. If you want your marriage to last, start by being honest with your spouse and building a foundation of trust. Sometimes this means we have to go out on a limb to do what is right. An example is found in the story of Alpo Martinez.
Honesty and trust are essential for both partners to feel secure in the relationship and to be able to weather the storms that inevitably come.
7. Don’t Allow Communication Gaps
Couples who are in a healthy relationship communicate often. They talk about their kids’ plans and schedules, what to get at the grocery store, and utility bill payments. But they also talk about their hopes and dreams, fears and worries. They don’t only discuss changes in their child’s life; they also talk about changes happening within themselves.
It’s important to talk about your hopes and dreams, fears and worries. Keep the communication going and you’ll be in good shape.
It’s always important to be honest in your communication with others. This forms the foundation for a lot of other important things, like working hard, having faith, not giving up, and being able to trust. All of these things are essential in any relationship – whether it’s with a friend, family member, or romantic partner. If you can’t be honest and open with your communication, it’ll be difficult to build a strong, lasting relationship.
This is especially true of marriage. A marriages success is dependent on the level of communication between husband and wife. If you want a happy and healthy marriage, than you need to be able to communicate with your spouse effectively. Marriage isn’t always easy, but learning how to communicate with your partner can help make things a lot easier.
Learning how to listen to your spouse and really understand what they are saying is an important part of communication. Also, being able to express yourself clearly without getting upset or defensive is essential. If you can learn how to do both of these things, than you will be well on your way to having a successful marriage.
Communication is the bridge that allows you to connect with your spouse. If you need help learning how to communicate, take our free course called, ‘Effective Communication In Marriage.’
8. Be Like A Person With No Elbows.
I’ll explain this reference in a moment. But frist, let’s focus on the issue of self-centeredness, and selfishness.
More marriages break because of selfishness than any other cause, even though it’s unlikely to show up on surveys. Many surveys attribute the cause to financial problems, lack of commitment, infidelity, or incompatibility, but the primary reason behind many of these is actually self-centeredness.
If you’re only focused on yourself, you’ll never realize how important it is to have a supportive partner.
When we were children, most of us were taught to share. We were encouraged to share our toys with others, to share our food, and to share our feelings. Somewhere along the way, many of us forgot how to share.
We became more focused on ourselves and our own needs and wants. We stopped sharing our lives with others and instead started living in a bubble. This selfish behavior can lead to a cycle of isolation and loneliness.
One way to break this cycle is to start sharing openly about your dreams and desires. When you share your hopes and dreams with others, it opens up the possibility for connection and collaboration. It also shows that you are interested in something beyond yourself.
Sharing openly about your dreams makes you more attractive to others and creates opportunities for meaningful relationships.
To dig deeper into this topic and discover how selfishness erodes your marriage, watch our video on ‘People With No Elbows.’
Final Thoughts on the Keys to a Healthy Marriage
If you want to learn to be happy in your marriage, these 8 keys to a healthy marriage will give you the foundation to build upon. They provide the minimalist approach to making marriage work because without these keys operating in your relationship, you will struggle to connect and build the marriage you desire.
A healthy and happy marriage is more important than other things we pursue in our lives, and it will last for a long time.
- 8 Keys To A Healthy Marriage
We have resources available to help you create the marriage you desire and deserve.
The Healthy Marriage Quiz
If you want specific help for your marriage, or you want to know your healthy marriage score, take the marriage quiz. You’ll get immediate access with suggestions on how to improve your relationship.
The Healthy Marriage Toolkit
Books, Courses, Programs, and Tools designed to help you create the marriage of your dreams.
Five Simple Steps Marriage Course
Marriage doesn’t have to be complicated. In this 5 part mini-series, you’ll discover practical steps to redesign your marriage.
Healthy Marriage Academy
Our courses will help you build a strong marriage. Each course is designed to meet a specific relationship need.
If you are having serious marriage struggles, we recommend starting with ‘Save the Marriage System‘ by Lee Baucom.