Do you want to build a healthy relationship with your partner? If so, then it is important that you develop habits for relationship success. In this article we will go over 11 tips that will help strengthen the bond that makes your partnership great!
Most people are not aware of how to make a relationship work. They have no idea what they should do to keep their relationship fresh and healthy. Negative patterns disrupt the marriage they desire.
According to statistics, only about 50% of relationships last longer than three years. This means that half the couples who get married end up getting divorced within this period of time. And even when the couple decides to stay together, many times problems arise in their relationship which can lead them into a divorce as well. So it’s clear that there are some things you need to know if you want your relationship with your partner or spouse to be successful and last for long term!
11 Tips To Build Healthy Marriage Habits
We created these tips for you so that you can learn how to make a relationship work and become more attractive towards your partner by following our simple tips! These habits will help both women AND men attract their partners in ways they never thought possible before!
Study these 11 tips to create a stronger, healthier relationship
Healthy Habit #1: Talk Every Day
According to researchers, talking to your partner every day about trivial issues, such as how their day was or who they met at work, will keep your partner interested in you and ensure they have a positive association with you.
This is because couples who talk often generally share important information about their life. And people tend to remember the person who gave them important information about themselves. So not only will talking on a regular basis make your partner feel cared for, but it will also make them more likely to remember you later on.
Additionally, doing the same things every day will make your partner more familiar with you and increase the probability of forming a strong connection.
When you talk every day with your spouse, you are able to strengthen your relationship. This helps both you and your spouse in many ways. You will be able to share personal thoughts, discuss the events of your day, and talk about your future plans. Talking every day to your spouse will also help you overcome everyday problems and build a closer bond as a couple.
Healthy Habit #2: Spend Time Alone With Your Spouse
Spending time alone with your spouse can be difficult, especially when you have children, jobs to attend to, and various hobbies. However, spending time alone with your spouse can be one of the most beneficial habits for your marriage.
There are many different reasons why spending time alone is good for your marriage. To start, research shows that spending time alone is an important way to encourage your spouse to be fully present with you when you are together.
In addition, it is a great time to relax and unwind, get centered, and focus on yourself. Spending time alone can also be very beneficial to your marriage, because it allows you to reconnect with yourself as an individual.
Why is spending time alone with your spouse so important? It will help you to understand your spouse and strengthen your mutual connection.
It gives you a great opportunity to connect closer with your spouse on an individual level.
You can work out any disagreements you’ve had, without making it seem like an argument.
When you spend time alone, you will begin to see yourself as a unit, since what is happening in your marriage affects both of you equally.
Healthy Habit Tip #3: Disconnect From Social Media At Night
Social media is a great way to keep in touch with your family and friends, but did you know that it can also be a big distraction in your marriage? That’s because many of us spend hours scrolling through our newsfeeds and updating our statuses without realizing how much time has passed.
There are many problems associated with overuse of social media. It interferes with your sleep schedule, wastes time, distracts you from your goals, and prevents you from connecting with your spouse in the process.
Most of us have several social media accounts and can check them at any time of day or night. Whether we’re sitting down for a morning cup of coffee or waiting for the kids to go to bed, it’s just so tempting to check Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter.
We may feel we can’t get through the day without knowing how everyone is doing. While it’s great to stay in touch online, we’ve all heard the warnings that too much time on social media can set us up for relationship problems, like jealousy and arguments about sharing family time.
Three ways to break the social media habit:
If you need to break an addiction or obsession with social media, try these three tips:
- Set up a family rule about when it’s okay to access social media and stick to it. For example, say you will all turn off your devices by a certain time every night.
- Change your settings so that you have to approve each post rather than checking constantly for updates. This way, you can just check your profile once or twice a day instead of dozens of times per day!
- Go on a social media fast. Cut it out for a weekend (or if you are daring, stop it for a week or even a month). This will help to eliminate the addictive behavior and give you the time you need to connect with your spouse more naturally.
Monitoring your social media use will help you to identify the problems that are caused by overuse and you will be able to create adjustments for yourself.
Healthy Habit Tip #4: Affirm Your Spouses Value
Affirming your spouses value is the best way to strengthen your marriage. When a husband or wife feels they have value, it helps them to appreciate the things that are important in life. In a marriage, whether you are a husband or a wife, your spouse is your greatest source of encouragement and strength.
If your marriage is lacking, or you feel as though you are not getting the support you need, then it is time to bring some change into your marriage. Start by affirming your spouses value. You will be amazed at the difference it makes in your relationship.
There’s no question that having your spouse’s support is important to your success. So how can you affirm their value?
It’s not as hard as you think. Just do the following: Start with what you see. Your spouse is one of the first things you see each morning. So start your day by affirming their value. Smile. Look them in the eyes and say, “Honey, I love how you look when you see me.”
The best thing about affirming your spouse’s value is that it will make your marriage stronger. Wouldn’t you rather be married to a man or woman who loves you unconditionally?
Healthy Habit Tip #5: Make Physical Contact [Hold Hands]
Most of us don’t think twice about making physical contact. We hug our children, we shake hands with colleagues, we give high-fives to co-workers and friends. And that’s all well and good. But how much thought have you given to the value of physical contact in a romantic relationship?
It may seem simplistic or silly, but being tactile with your partner is important. Whether it’s holding hands, cuddling on the couch, or giving them a hug hello or goodbye, physical contact is a vital part of any healthy relationship.
Holding hands is a simple and easy way to show your partner you care. Holding hands is a simple way to make a connection with your partner. It is an easy way to show that you are interested in them. Holding hands demonstrates that you care for your significant other. It shows that you love them and that you are willing to support them.
Physical touch is an important part of any relationship, especially in long-term relationships.
Three things holding hands accomplishes in your marriage:
- It grounds your relationship in reality and the ‘here and now’
Touching connects you to the present. It’s a way of indicating ‘I’m here…right now…and I’m with you emotionally, as well as physically.’
- It strengthens the emotional bond between you and your partner, particularly in old age when physical contact becomes increasingly difficult. The importance of touch: a study by the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign found that touch is an essential part of any relationship, fundamental to feelings of attachment, well-being, intimacy, satisfaction and communication.
- It reminds you of the effort and commitment you have made to each other, and by extension, reinforces the value of your relationship.
It also helps to restore intimacy in relationships that have been damaged or broken.
Healthy Habit Tip #6: Practice Verbal Engagement [Say ‘I Love You’]
Chances are, you’ve said the three little words a million times without thinking much of it. But did you know that saying ‘I love you’ is one of the most important factors in a healthy relationship? When you say it to your spouse, the results are healthy for your marriage. So, how do you say ‘I love you’ in a way that can benefit your marriage?
Say, “I Love You” Often
It doesn’t take long to say ‘I love you’ but it takes time to say it often. It is important that you make this emotional declaration of love more than once a day. Try to express your feelings verbally during the day. This can be in the form of a quick ‘I love you’ thrown over your shoulder or an evening ‘I love you’ before bedtime.
Saying ‘I Love You’ will help deepen your bonding.
It builds your spouse’s connection with you. When someone says ‘I love you’, the message is directed at both of them, which makes it one of the key ways couples bond. So learning to say ‘I love you’ more often will further your marriage.
Saying ‘I Love You’ in a Fun Way
There is a joy in saying ‘I love you’. Practicing saying it in an enjoyable way, such as this, can help you express your feelings of love on a regular basis.
Try to think of fun ways to say it too. One of the best ways to do so is by celebrating that special occasion with your spouse-be it their birthday, anniversary or holiday, saying ‘I love you’ will mean more when you smile while saying them.
One more thought: As a prelude to saying “I love you,” try telling your mate that you appreciate them, and tell them what you appreciate about them. There are numerous ways in which appreciation benefits your relationship. When you appreciate your significant other, you raise their self-esteem.
When you tell your spouse that you appreciate them, you nurture your relationship by showing your mate that you are interested in all that they have to offer. If you are married, you can always say “I love you” on a daily basis.
Healthy Habit Tip #7: Kiss Often
Most couples kiss each other goodnight before going to sleep, but did you know that kissing your spouse is good for your relationship? In fact, experts have found that couples who kiss each other often are more satisfied with their marriage. This is because kissing allows you to connect with your spouse on a very intimate level, and it can increase your feelings of love, attraction, and passion.
According to Kory Floyd (Professor in the Hugh Downs School of Human Communication at Arizona State University) has studied kissing for quite a while. He indicates several non-romantic benefits of kissing.
- Lower cholesterol levels
- Decrease stress
- Lower stress hormones
- Lower blood pressure
- Stronger immune system
Those are a few of the health benefits. He also adds that it increases relationship satisfaction.
“One of the things I give as an example of the link between affection and health is the way you feel when you’re having a really horrible day, and everything’s going wrong. And in the midst of that stressful day, you see somebody that you care about and they put their arms around you and give you a hug. That hug may not change anything about what’s going bad in your day, but it can change everything about the way you feel in that moment. It feels like all of your stress is just melting away.”– Kory Floyd
A study done at Penn State University found:
Kissing has some social benefits as well. Kissing will quickly increase hormones that make you happy; chemicals like serotonin, dopamine, and oxytocin are responsible for this pleasure. Kissing is a natural way to relieve pain. Kissing activates endorphins, which are natural chemicals in the body that can be more effective than opioids at relieving pain without the harmful side effects of a narcotic.
Healthy Habit Tip #8: Fight Fair
While some couples argue all the time, others avoid conflict altogether. However, when you don’t fight, you also deprive yourselves of the chance to resolve issues and move forward with your marriage. So, instead of being so hard on yourselves for arguing, try assessing the quality of your arguments.
Fighting fair is an important part of keeping your marriage happy and healthy. However, it is not always easy.
In a marriage, you and your partner will inevitably have disagreements. It is important however, to remember the basics of fighting fair, so you both come away from an argument feeling respected, and so your relationship doesn’t suffer.
The key to a fair fight is motive and attitude. If your motive is to harm, belittle, or manipulate your spouse with an argument, it’s wrong. A fair fight is one that seeks a solution to a problem – a solution that benefits both of you.
One word of advice: Happy marriages are those that respect, honor, and have the best interest of your partner in mind. When this is intact, arguments are merely discussions about good solutions.
Healthy Habit Tip #9: Pray Together
Many married couples find that praying together helps them feel closer to one another.
But what exactly does praying together mean? Why is it important? Praying together in a spiritual sense is when you lay your spouse to rest and focus on the Lord. In a marriage, this type of communication can help strengthen your relationship, protect you from temptation, and truly help you grow closer to God.
When you pray together, it reminds you both that the other person is just as important to God as you are. Praying together shows your commitment to the marriage and proves to your spouse that they are valued in your life. It allows for a deeper connection with God at such an intimate level.
When you pray together, you can find great strength, comfort, and healing from God. Just spending a few minutes a day praying together can make a huge difference in your marriage.
Since marriage is a spiritual union (not just a physical one), praying together is a chance to become closer to each other, and to God.
If you are having trouble finding common ground for discussion or if you want to avoid an argument, prayers are always appropriate. Even when you do not agree, it is still important to be respectful of each other and spend time discussing things that matter to each other.
Prayers can help improve communication in your marriage and help build your relationship with God.
People bond when they share things that matter to them. They get closer when they talk about deeper things in their relationship. Praying together gives you the opportunity to share the most intimate aspects of life together.
So, not only does prayer connect us with God, it creates a deep bond in our relationship to one another.
Healthy Habit Tip #10: Share A Hobby
Having a hobby together creates a shared experience.
A hobby can be anything from reading books, playing video games, or playing sports, to collecting stamps, growing plants, watching movies, or collecting coins. The key to having a successful marriage is to find things that you can do together.
It gives you opportunities to spend more time together, as well as develop and grow your own individual interests.
Consider this: sharing hobbies can strengthen your marriage in a number of different ways. Here are three ways it improves your relationship.
1. It creates a sense of camaraderie.
If you share a hobby, you’re doing something together that you both enjoy. You’re likely to feel more connected to your spouse, since you’re both interested in something and sharing the experience.
2. It creates new experiences.
If you find one hobby together that is fun, it’s likely that you’ll want to try other activities together. This can lead to a greater sense of bonding, and encourage you both to grow and learn new things together.
3. It encourages conversation.
Sharing a similar hobby shows your spouse that you respect their desires and preferences, so they’re more likely to open up to you about their interests or hobbies as well. If they enjoy the same activity as you, it can encourage them to talk about what they’re interested in as well.
Healthy Habit Tip #11: Be Mindful
Mindfulness is a skill you can learn and a habit you can form.
Mindfulness simply means being present – being mindful of your spouse.
It’s easy to get caught up in the busy-ness of life and neglect the things that matter most. There are two easy ways to create the habit of mindfulness.
First, practice focusing on your marriage by keeping a journal of things you appreciate, like, and enjoy about your spouse. You don’t have to write a lengthy journal entry each day, just jot down a few things about your spouse you are grateful for. This will help you maintain focus on your relationship.
You will discover the more you do this, the more mindful you become of your spouse.
Second, remind yourself to think in the present. We often get caught up in what we want to do next. Many times this is at the expense of what is happening right now. By reminding yourself that there is no time like the present, you force your attention to think about the ‘now.’
These are simple ways to create the habit of mindfulness in your marriage.
Final Thoughts On Habits For Relationship Success
Taking the time to build healthy habits for your relationship is critical to having a happy and successful marriage. In each of the tips listed above, you can see how they build on each other to help strengthen and improve your marriage. As you develop more habits, you and your spouse will have fewer problems in your marriage, which means that you’ll be happier together.
When you commit to these important habits in life, not only does it ensure that your marriage will continue for many years to come, but it also helps prepare you for all the joys and challenges that life has to offer.
Don’t forget, marriage isn’t one-sided. Your spouse has a responsibility to your relationship as much as you do. In order to succeed at your new healthy habits, both of you will need to participate in them.
Changing unhealthy habits is difficult but not impossible for couples. It is important however, that both of you are willing to commit yourselves fully towards the changes necessary for a happier marriage and healthier life together.
Here are the eleven tips once again:
- Healthy Habit #1: Talk Every Day
- Healthy Habit #2: Spend Time Alone With Your Spouse
- Healthy Habit Tip #3: Disconnect From Social Media At Night
- Healthy Habit Tip #4: Affirm Your Spouses Value
- Healthy Habit Tip #5: Make Physical Contact [Hold Hands]
- Healthy Habit Tip #6: Practice Verbal Engagement [Say ‘I Love You’]
- Healthy Habit Tip #7: Kiss Often
- Healthy Habit Tip #8: Fight Fair
- Healthy Habit Tip #9: Pray Together
- Healthy Habit Tip #10: Share A Hobby
- Healthy Habit Tip #11: Be Mindful
We have resources available to help you create the marriage you desire and deserve.
The Healthy Marriage Quiz
If you want specific help for your marriage, or you want to know your healthy marriage score, take the marriage quiz. You’ll get immediate access with suggestions on how to improve your relationship.
The Healthy Marriage Toolkit
Books, Courses, Programs, and Tools designed to help you create the marriage of your dreams.
Five Simple Steps Marriage Course
Marriage doesn’t have to be complicated. In this 5 part mini-series, you’ll discover practical steps to redesign your marriage.
Healthy Marriage Academy
Our courses will help you build a strong marriage. Each course is designed to meet a specific relationship need.
If you are having serious marriage struggles, we recommend starting with ‘Save the Marriage System‘ by Lee Baucom.