We’ve all heard the statement that couples that pray together stay together. In this article, we present three kingdom principles about prayer every couple should understand.
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Here are some eye-opening statistics:
While 50 percent of first marriages end in divorce, and 78 percent of second marriages end in divorce, less than 1 percent of couples who pray together daily end their marriages. (Source)
Prayer allows individuals, couples, and families to come closer to God through healing.
Prayer can be meditative (silent), colloquial (asking for abstract things like guidance or forgiveness), petitionary (asking for materialistic things), or ritual (memorized or read from a book).
While it can be all of these things, it can also enrich the quality of marriage and family life. In fact, The Family: A Proclamation to the World identifies prayer as an important element in successful marriages and families.
Recently, couple prayer has been the topic of increasing research. Many married couples who have relied on prayer in addressing marital problems report that using prayer within a marriage tends to increase their level of satisfaction within the marriage. Other couples report that prayer left a constant impression upon their thoughts and actions throughout the day, making their interaction more positive. Participation in religious activities, including prayer, decreases marital conflict, verbal aggression, and stalemate strategies when resolving conflicts
There is something to be said about keeping a spiritual foundation as your cornerstone. Prayer keeps you connected and refocuses you on the kingdom more than just each other and the natural things of life. We are spiritual beings.
Forgiveness is something Jesus demonstrated to us. In fact, He says, because you are forgiven you are empowered to forgive.
We all hurt each other and especially those we are closest to in our families, namely our spouse.
Because of familiarity and because we are closest to them relationally, we can get sloppy or at times take each other for granted.
For Christians, when we are suffering we are told to pray. If you have ever suffered in a marriage you generally don’t have to be told to pray.
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You will pray to stay afloat when you’re struggling within your marriage.
When you move from surviving in your marriage to thriving in your marriage it can be found in the secret place: prayer.
Prayer unlocks the kingdom into your life as a married couple. Prayer is powerful and mysterious.
All of heaven waits to release God’s best when two agree asking anything in his name, it will be done for them. (Matthew 18:19)
Makes you wonder why we don’t pray more together as a couple doesn’t it?
Nothing can create unity and humility like prayer. It takes making it a priority in your life as a couple.
It also takes humility because you’re vulnerable when you first start praying together.
It’s tough to pray with someone when you’re mad at them, so it helps you practice forgiveness first, then your hearts are cleared to pray according to scripture. (Matthew 5:23)
Let’s look at some specific scriptures about prayer and the kingdom of God. Let’s look at how we can apply them to praying with our spouse.
Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when He falls, for He has no one to help him up.
There are important principles that govern the spiritual laws of the kingdom of God. Here are three that impact praying together as a couple.
Kingdom principle 1: Togetherness
We aren’t designed to do life alone or independent of God. When we pray together we can accomplish more together rather than independently. We can encourage one another and help our spouses accomplish their dreams and our own.
Prayer can keep you feeling connected to one another even as you help each other succeed together in life. It doesn’t have to be a prayer meeting. A simple short prayer together over things is sufficient.
Behold how good and pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! It is like the precious oil upon the head, running down on the beard of Aaron, running down on the edge of his garments. It is like the dew of Hermon, descending upon the mountains of Zion; For there The Lord commanded the blessing
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God is drawn to unity. He loves order. The Father, son and Holy Spirit were always in agreement. They were on the same page, accomplishing the same goal.
Prayer can be a way of keeping you on the same page, talking to God about your needs as a couple and your struggles.
Now this is the confidence that we have in him, that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the positions that we have asked of him.
Getting an understanding of what God wants for your marriage is half the battle.
Knowing God’s will or being ignorant of it can affect your marriage. It’s hard to agree with Biblical principles if we don’t know them. Some things are no-brainers, like moral principles, or communicating with your spouse and feeding your marriage.
But what about other decisions that take discernment and wisdom to go in a specific direction as a couple? Being on the same page spiritually is imperative. Prayer helps us do that.
Being on the same page with your spouse and on the same page with God is a win-win. Both are necessary. This scripture is quite the promise.
If we pray anything according to God’s will He hears us and acts on our behalf. Problem is, it takes time to know God, the Bible, and His will. It takes time and effort.
Maybe you’re not the reading type because you’re always moving. I understand. Thank God for Bible Apps and books on audible.
You can find a great church or find great teaching to help you grow spiritually and discern what God’s word says to you.
Commitment to our spouse and knowing God’s will takes time but every step you take towards God, He also steps closer to you. Same principle in our marriages. All relationships are reciprocal.
A soul connection is the deepest connection we can have. We are created to live from the inside out. We are born spirit, soul and body. When we connect spiritually (this is the deepest part of us) we can anticipate God revealing himself to us through prayer.
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6 Things To Pray For Your Spouse
Praying for your spouse is one of the most important things you can do for them. It shows that you care about their wellbeing and want them to experience all the good things that God has in store for them.
When you pray for your spouse, you are asking God to bless them, protect them, and guide them. This is a selfless act that can have a profound impact on your spouse’s life.
A prayer for your spouse can be a very intimate and personal thing. Here are six things you can pray for your spouse:
1. Pray for their spiritual growth.
This can include praying for them to deepen their relationship with God, grow in their faith, and become more Christ-like.
2. Pray for their physical health.
This can include praying for them to be free from illness and pain, to have energy and strength, and to live a long and healthy life.
3. Pray for their mental and emotional health.
This can include praying for them to be free from anxiety, depression, and stress, to have a positive outlook on life, and to be wise and discerning.
4. Pray for their relationships.
This can include praying for them to have healthy and loving relationships with family, friends, and others, and to be a source of encouragement and support to others.
5. Pray for their work and career.
This can include praying for them to find fulfillment in their work, to be successful in their career, and to be a good steward of their talents and abilities.
6. Thank God for your spouse.
This can include thanking God for their good qualities, for their place in your life, and for the blessings they bring to you.
Praying for your spouse is a way to support them in their relationship with God. It is a way to show your love and commitment to them. It is also a way to grow closer to God yourself.
Related Questions about Praying As A Couple
Prayer seems difficult for many couples. We often get questions related to couples and their prayer life. Here are a few we get often.
Do Couples That Pray Together Stay Together?
We started this article with a few statistics that show couples who do religious activities together (mainly prayer) are less likely to be dissatisfied in their marriage, and less likely to separate or divorce.
What Does The Bible Say About A Couple Praying Together?
There are several scriptures that discuss married life. Most that deal with prayer are general. In other words, the scriptures that talk about our daily prayer habits and corporate prayer in church can be applied (and should be) to married life.
Here are a few to consider:
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I desire therefore that the men pray everywhere, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting. [1Ti 2:8 NKJV]
Pray without ceasing, [1Th 5:17 NKJV]
“For where two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there in the midst of them.” [Mat 18:20 NKJV]
These all continued with one accord in prayer and supplication, with the women and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with His brothers. [Act 1:14 NKJV]
Husbands, likewise, dwell with [them] with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as [being] heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered. [1Pe 3:7 NKJV]
You also helping together in prayer for us, that thanks may be given by many persons on our behalf for the gift [granted] to us through many. [2Co 1:11 NKJV]
Prayer is certainly one of the ways we connect to God and grow spiritually. You can also include the following in the list:
Worshipping together in church
Reading and studying the Bible together
Doing daily devotions together
Sharing spiritual things together
Serve your church, community, and others together
The same activities that help you know God better as an individual can be used to help you grow as a couple.
Final Thoughts on The Couple That Prays Together
Statistics show couples that develop a spiritual foundation for their relationship are happier and well-balanced. The couple that prays together has a stronger sense of togetherness, unity, and purpose.
In this article, we discussed three kingdom principles about praying as a couple.
Why Men Pull Away addresses the issue of why men tend to withdraw and how to effectively get them to reengage.
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Michelle is a speaker, author, and founder of MichelleLeeNolan.com. She writes about issues that affect women and spiritual growth. She and Joseph work together to help strengthen families and marriages.
